Happy Fathers Day! (Part 1)

I wrote a post called My Sweet Daddy that will cover some of what I want to express today.  The only difference is that I realize that this really may be my daddy's last Fathers Day here on earth.  You start evaluating how fragile life and time really are.  I think of all the times I took for granted that dad was just there in all his wisdom and sweetness.  Now, I can't even hear his voice anymore....I really took that for granted.  What I would give to hear him sing again (he was always singing), or for my kids to hear him say or do something silly.  Now, all they can do is tell them something exciting going on with them and hug him and tell him they love him (which they do doing random times).  The other morning Madelyn ran to their room opened the door, yelled "I love you papa and nana!" closed the door and kept right on with what she was doing.  Hudson still wanders in there several times a day to get daddy's hand to express his love.  In fact the other morning he was coughing and he kept bugging my mom like, "get in there and see what he needs!"  Watching my kids figure out where to fit in all of this has been awesome....they love him just the same, I think because they see how much their mommy loves her daddy!  

Parenting 101

The title sort of sounds like a college course doesn't it?  Don't you wish there was a college degree offered in parenting?  I do! : ) I love my 5 precious kiddos, but sometimes they completely stump me and I don't know what to do.  Our church has offered a 4 part parenting class and Sam and I signed up to give us a refresher.  Its so easy to get tired and unfocused on the important things in raising and training children, especially when they are in the ages of 2-7.  Sometimes training (proactive training) is so tedious and overwhelming when you have lots of little ones, however the benefits are so rewarding.

I was reminded again of the importance of being as consistent as possible.  I realized that some things in parenting are completely my deal, not my kids deal.  I am going to work on creating a more structured atmosphere as to avoid some conflict and create a peaceful environment.  If you know me, I am not very organized, but am looking to do a better job at that.  I want my kids to be great adults that will be humble and moldable to God.

Packing Is Never An Easy Job

So, we are a little over 24 hours away from our departure to Chicago and I am busily packing bags for all of us.  Even though Sam and I are the only 2 actually going....all 5 kids are going elsewhere.  We have a crew of wonderful friends who are watching our kiddos for the next 4 days while we head north.  I have to say that I am excited about the trip, however, a bit nervous about how my kids will do without me for those few days.  I am leaving them with people who I know will love and care for them, yet I still feel a bit "sad" about it.  I know they will be fine and have a great time and Sam and I really need this time away.  We will celebrate our 10th anniversary on the 9th, so I am looking forward to some adult conversation without being interrupted a million times...or eating a whole meal without interruption...not just one meal, but 3 days in a row worth. : )
Please pray for Sam and I, as well as Harvest Bible Fellowship as we seek God's will about a church planting opportunity.  Our interview is scheduled for Friday afternoon from 2:30-4:00pm (central time).

Quick Update-Trusting in the Lord's Plan

Just wanted to type a quick update about the Harvest Training Center opportunity.  We finally got a phone call back today that we will be going to Chicago next weekend!  Yes, Sam and I are going alone!!! This is even more exciting because its a week away from us celebrating our 10th anniversary.  I am so excited for this opportunity and being able to be away together for 3 days, which is a first for us in about 8 years.
So, my mind is racing in preparing for this trip away.  The kids are all being split up to different peoples houses while we are gone so I have to pack all of them separately (except Bryson & Landon).  I also am a bit nervous about leaving my baby Hudson for 3 days.  It is easy to leave the older ones because they understand that I will be back in 3 days, but Hudson just doesn't.  However, I am very confident in his caregiver...no worries there and I trust the Lord to take care of all of them while we are away.
Please pray for Sam as well as he will be traveling to Hickory, NC on Thursday to visit with a Harvest affiliate church there and the pastor.  He will spend the day with him and be involved in some staff meetings, etc to get a feel for the ministry there and how things are done.  Also, pray for Sam as he has to prepare a 25 minute message to preach to the staff at Harvest while we are up there for "evaluation weekend."  I know he would appreciate prayers as he seeks clarity and understanding.
I have to admit this past weekend I was a bit discouraged because they hadn't called yet and I was thinking, "God, is anything EVER going to work out for us."  Let me just answer this and say I know that was a dumb thing to say!  I was thinking very selfishly for the moment.  I have complete peace knowing that God is ultimately in control of everything!  If this is His purpose and plan then so be it, but if it isn't I will trust that He knows whats best and has an even better plan than I could ever imagine.  Whew....that was hard to type, but so true!

The Waiting Game

I think I would have to say after my short 33 years on earth that waiting has to be the hardest part of life!  I see it in little things, like when I am cooking dinner and having to wait for something to cook, when I needed to be finished 30 minutes ago. : )  I see it when I am sitting in the drive thru line that is suppose to be "fast" and isn't.  I see it when I am ready to go somewhere and we are right on time and my 5 kids are not in so much of a hurry to get in the van, buckled and ready to go.  I see it when I am watching my sweet daddy suffer and wonder how much longer till he gets to go "home."  I see it when I am praying for a particular need we have and I need it taken care of today and it doesn't get answered how I see fit!  But, then I am reminded of all the times God has blessed and taken care of us in His timing and it always brings Him glory.  I always have to stand back and just say, "thank you Lord!"  If things only worked out the way I thought, then I wouldn't need God.  So, again today and everyday I am reminded that waiting is part of the "game" of life.  I could type on and on about the things I am "waiting for," but in the end it is just empty words to you.  God is the one that will answer in His time.  He is faithful!

Psa 27:14 - Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!

Psa 31:24 - Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the LORD!

Psa 37:7 - Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!

Psa 37:34  - Wait for the LORD and keep his way, and he will exalt you to inherit the land; you will look on when the wicked are cut off.

Psa 38:15 - But for you, O LORD, do I wait; it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer.

Psa 39:7- "And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you.

Psa 130:5 - I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope;

Happy Birthday to ME!

Yesterday I celebrated my 33rd birthday!  I sent a text to one of my friends and told her that 33 felt pretty good!!!  Sometimes I think about getting "old" and it seems a bit scary, but mostly I have learned to embrace the life God has given me and enjoy every minute.  Thought I would reminisce about a few things that have happened this past year in my life (keeping this list as brief as possible):

• In June of last year my dad was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Carcinoma of the base of tongue and into his lymph nodes.  This completely changed my life!
• In June/July, Sam was gone 2 separate whole weeks for camp once and youth conference another and I survived with 5 kids all by myself!!!
• In August I started my 2nd year of homeschooling, this time adding Landon in K5, Bryson started 2nd grade.  I had no idea what this school year was going to hold...
• In September Sam resigned his position at Tabernacle because he had a pretty promising position at another church, however that fell through.  God had much BIGGER plans for us!!!!
• In November we moved in with my parents while Sam continued his job search.  I started working part time/seasonal for Gymboree, which has become permanent since and I enjoy very much.
• In December dad had a PET scan after he completed his radiation/chemo treatments and told that the cancer had responded some but was still present.  Also, we were blessed with a bountiful Christmas for our kids, thanks to some wonderful people!!!
• In January we joined a small group at church.  Couldn't imagine then how important this great group of people would become in my life.  I have been so challenged and encouraged by them all.
• In February my new niece was born into this world and I became an aunt for the first time!  Love Adam & Latosha, and just wish they lived closer to us.  I also started a 8 week study
• In March, we surprised the kids with a couple days away at Great Wolf Lodge.  We had a fabulous time and were so glad that God provided for us to go.  Dad had another PET scan near the middle of the month that confirmed the cancer was definitely there and growing! Sam received a phone call from Harvest Bible Fellowship to start the interview process.
• In April dad had some major setbacks with his health that led him to choose no more treatments.  Now, I have the privilege to help care for him.  We also enjoyed a quick visit from my brother, sister in law and new niece.  I loved meeting her and enjoyed getting to know my sister in law even better.  

So, I guess the last year has been pretty crazy!  Some days I just wake up and think, will my life ever be "normal" again, or is this the new normal?  Seriously, I thank God everyday for His blessings on me.  I have an awesome, Godly husband who has a burning desire in his heart to passionately serve God.  I have 5 beautiful, healthy children who bring much excitement to my life.  I have 2 parents who love me and have given us a place to live and an opportunity to serve them in a way that I never thought.  I have great friends who have literally become like family to me over the last year.  I will have to say that I can't imagine what God has in store for me this year....but really can it get more exciting than this?

My Better Half

I remember being a little girl and dreaming of what it would be like to be married.  I had lots of fairy tales on my mind and thought my prince charming would come and sweep me off my feet and we would live happily ever after.  Don't get me wrong, I love my husband with all my heart and wouldn't trade him for anything, but life isn't such a fairy tale.  Sometimes those love stories that are in all the movies make marriage and love look so easy and somewhat fake.
I am so thankful that God has given me a husband who loves God with all of his heart.  Looking back over the almost 10 years of marriage (June 9th), I see how God has brought both of us together.  It was in God's perfect plan.  God knew exactly that I would need Sam to help me become more like Christ and to challenge me to grow spiritually.  I love that we can sit down and talk about spiritual things and how they affect us and our family.  My husband has made a lot of hard choices and decisions over the last 10 years, but I have watched him grow in grace and become a better Christ follower because of it.  Walking away from everything you know and are comfortable with isn't easy, but I am thankful for how he has led our family.
I have no idea where God will lead us next or how that will work out, but I know that I have a husband who loves God even more than he loves me-and for that I am grateful!